


I'll Be There

by Wicked_Falcon



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-12
Updated: 2015-10-17
Packaged: 2018-04-24 10:39:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 11,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4916326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wicked_Falcon/pseuds/Wicked_Falcon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint and Nat have endured many trials through their long partnership.  Now, another surprise is in store for them.  Will it bring them closer or turn them to ashes?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hope

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing of the characters but the plot is solely mine. They will be returned back to their original authors safe but slightly more used and wiser for their adventures.

Chapter 1: Hope

 

Her stomach was queasy as she glanced once more into the regions of the toilet that should not be closely inspected by any human being. Running her hand through her short hair as she braced herself once more against the bowl as her thin shoulders shook with the effort of trying to empty her stomach contents. She could feel sweat beading on her forehead as she closed her eyes and started to count to ten before she slid down onto the floor. All her energy spent from her morning ritual of emptying her stomach. She knew the signs but disbelief coursed through her veins. It should not have been possible with the amount of modifications and damage that her body had taken. But yet, she rested her hand on her stomach, gently cupping the growing life that her body now held.

Abortion did not even cross her mind. How could she even think that she could get rid of the only thing that held a little bit of him? The tears slipping silently down her pale cheeks as she leaned her head back against the wall. Her eyes still closed against the fresh onslaught of pain that was piercing her in the region of her heart; pulling her knees to her chest as she rested her forehead upon them. Her mind pulling her back to the morning that he left her, quiet and pliant amongst the rumbled sheets. His callous fingers dancing along her spine as his lips followed as he murmured promises of return before capturing her lips in a searing kiss that lead them down the path of last night activities. A small smile tugged at the corner of her lips before she wiped at her eyes and forced herself into a standing position in front of the bathroom mirror.

Natasha took a careful look in the mirror at herself, taking notice of the weight that she had lost from the news that she had received not four weeks beforehand that her partner, Hawkeye, had been killed in action. The dread filled her stomach as she thought about it when she rubbed at her arms. She was at a complete lost on what she was meant to do. She felt she could not properly mourn because Clint's body was never formally identified among the dead. She was in a complete no man's land, neither here nor there, at present. But she was certain on the only thing that her body was saying but her mind was trying so hard to deny. Natasha splashed some water over her face to hide the fact that she was not sleeping as well as she should have been and she had been crying.

It was time for her to face reality and start to get on with her life as best as she could. But first, she needed to confirm what she instinctively already knew. Quickly, she rinsed her mouth and ran a comb through her shorten locks. She walked out of the bathroom as she snagged the first article of clothing that she could find and tugged them up and over her body before she stepped through her door in search for the resident doctor, Bruce; rolling her eyes when she did finally found him sitting at his desk in one of the labs.

"What can I do you for, Natasha?" Bruce hummed as he continued to stared down through the microscope. His fingers adjusting the settings before he briefly looked up and jotted a notation down on his pad beside him before he placed his pen down and folded his arms. His rich chocolate eyes rested upon her as she shifted around on her feet.

"I think I'm pregnant!" Natasha blurted out before she started chewed her inner cheek which was most unusual for her. She was never this nervous before but she never did think that she would have been in this situation. She had seen how Bruce's brows drew together as he tried to comprehend what she was saying.

"Well, it wasn't me." A smile played with the corner of his lips before he unfolded his arms and walked over to a cabinet. Shifting a few things around before sighing as he pulled what he was looking for out.

"That would be an impossible feat." Natasha retorted with some heat to her voice. The mental shaking was going away now that she had let someone else in on her secret.

"And we just won't mention that a certain archer who would have had me pinned to the wall in a heartbeat." Bruce smirked as he patted the area beside him. "There's two ways we can do this, blood or urine." He carefully watched her mouth move into a thin line at the mere mention of needles. He could understand her utter distasteful stance on the subject, especially after being used as a pin cushion. "How long do you think that you are?"

"I don't know. Obviously more than four weeks." Natasha bit out. She really didn't like where the conversation was heading. "What's the difference?" She placed her elbow on the table and rested her chin in her cupped hand.

"Well, with blood we can get a base line on what is happening and start to monitor you from there. I realise that this is an impossible situation to be in but we have to make sure that the baby will be delivered to full term or not."

"Okay." She huffed as she held her arm out for the blood to be taken.

"I want to run full blood work to see what vitamins and minerals that you would be needing as the pregnancy progressed. We need to also get your weight as well to make sure that you're gaining the correct amount." Bruce muttered off as he carefully drew the desired amount that he would need for the tests. He would only like to do this once if he was able too. He could feel the daggers that Natasha was throwing at him.

"So how long does it take?" Natasha murmured at she glanced down into her lap. She could already feel herself getting nervous. This was another completely foreign emotion to her. Her brows drew down as she pondered on this thought.

"Considering where we are," Bruce glanced around at the state-of-the-art technology that surrounded him. "We can confirm your pregnancy in about an hour. The rest should only take a couple of days." He frowned for a moment as he continued to watch her. A sudden feeling of primal protectiveness flooded his body as the Hulk made his decision known, which in turn, made Bruce uncomfortable at the flaring sensation.

"That is good." Natasha hummed absently as she watched her fingers lock and unlock before she glanced up and pierced Bruce with her intensive expression. One that Bruce gathered that she had picked up from Clint when he had been alive.  
"What am I going to do?" She whispered distraughtly as she quickly stood up and started to pace the floor.

"What do you want to do?" Bruce hedged. He had been in these situations before but never when the other parent was gone. It was strange watching such a strong person slowly fall into themselves.

"I'm not made to do this. I was never created to give life, only to take it." Natasha's shoulders slump as she turned to look at Bruce with pleading eyes. Bruce could understand where she was coming from.

"Do you think that Clint thought that when he gave you a second chance at life?" Bruce slowly stood up before going around the counter and leaning a hip against it as his arms folding across his chest as he lifted his brow up and waited for her to answer his question.

"No one knows what that crazy male was thinking at the time." Natasha spluttered as her cheeks slightly tinged with red. She knew well and proper what he had been thinking in that dark mind of his; the dark attraction that seemed to simmer deeply for each other. The dancing flight or fight instincts with the innuendos and sexual tension that swirled around them as they traded blow for blow. The atmosphere heating up with each moment until he had her pinned to the wall with a strong forearm to her throat and his breath heavy against her ear. That was when she realised she was truly in danger when a sharp tingle flared down her spine to rest in her nether regions.

"But you sure did." Bruce chuckled at the dark glance she shot his way. "I'm a male. I have an inkling of what he was thinking." He shrugged his shoulders unapologetic as he stood up straight again.

"You have been spending too much time with Tony." Natasha muttered as she briefly closed her eyes against his probing ones.

"Really, wouldn't have noticed." Bruce smirked as she threw another glare at him. "Anyway, I love this bantering but I need you to step on those scales for me." He indicated them with the direction of his finger.

"Why?" Natasha asked as she stalked over to the scales and eyed them like an enemy that they were.

"Once again, we need a base line to begin somewhere to monitor how your body is dealing with the baby." Bruce stated in his ever patient way as he watch Natasha step onto them and groaned when she see her weight.

"So in other words, I'll be watched closely." Natasha muttered darkly as she turned her heated gaze upon Bruce. Who in turn only raised his eyebrows and waited for her to say her weight back to him. "Weight is 45 kilograms."

"You have lost some weight but that was to be expected." Bruce clucked his tongue as he quickly wrote it down before staring at her again. "I need you to start moderating your alcohol intake and eating more healthy. You need to gain the weight back that you have lost. How are you sleeping?" He scribbled some more.  
"When I can." Natasha murmured as she lowered her head down. She did not want to speak about the nightmares that kept her awake at night.

"As long as you are able to get your bare minimum! I can't ask for anymore than that." Bruce nodded his head. He knew that she would look after herself. "As you already know that you will be feeling sick and these times, may or may not, be mornings only. May I suggest crackers in the mornings before getting out of bed to help with the morning sickness? There is a possibly that the tiredness may increase and your body will become hyper sensitive as well." He racked his brain for more information that she may need.

"Is that all?" Natasha asked as she stepped off the scales. Her stomach was starting to growl and she still needed to begin her morning routine. Though, she would now have to take it a little easier if the results turned out to be positive.

"Yeah, I think." Bruce scratched at the back of his head.

"You know to keep this to yourself for now." Natasha warned just as she stepped through the door and made her way to the kitchen to find herself something to eat. Bruce shook his head before he started to analysis her blood work and contemplate about the impossible situation that they all face now; possibly a pregnant Natasha with no Clint in sight. He shuddered slightly at that thought.

* * *

He was officially killed in action. At least this way, he could save them from the monster that lurked deep within; the beast that only came out to play whenever Hawkeye was needed. The cruel and unfeeling person that he had became when he had to take the shot. He did not have that inner struggle of debating with himself on the rights and wrongs of his job. He was a proficient assassin. He enjoyed his work and that was until Loki came into his already twisted life and jacked knifed it into something that he could barely comprehend anymore. Sure, he finally got to taste and feel Natasha's skin but he had crossed a line that he promised himself when he first went up against her. He would not betray her trust like he did.

He cursed himself as he punched his pillow into submission. He really needed to get his mind from the last time that he saw her and how she looked against his sheets. The light from dawn's fingers skimming along her curves as her pouty lips were opened slightly as she softly drew a breath into her lungs. He just could not help himself as he lightly traced her spine with his callous fingers. Whispering words that he knew he had no right to speak and promise to her, of all people. Watching her squirm awake as he gently roused her back into the land of the living before he sent her back into the heavens with his hands, mouth and body.

One thing that he could be happy about was the modifications done to Natasha body. Otherwise, he would not have taken the risk that he did. A small smirk played on his lips as his hands pillowed his head. His mind drifted back to the examination room when she first came in to be processed and the feelings of being appalled by having that decision forcibly taken away from her. No one had that right and he had never pressed the matter with her. No one lived long in their line of work. There was always someone out to get you and that was what you had to live with. He chuckled darkly at the first moment that he had laid eyes on Natasha. The flowing lines as she moved with grace as she worked the room, getting closer to her target. The way that she had fought him with everything that she had. He had finally meet a kindred soul; someone that he could call his own.

She was his equal, his mate, and there was nothing that he could do about that. So he did the next best option that was opened to him and he became her best friend in a life that was new and exciting to her. It took time to build that trust between them, to have that comfort zone where they could be themselves and not the masks that they put on for the world to see. They were together in every sense of word but the physical sense with no matter how much he wished differently. Natasha just never seemed ready to begin anything with him, so, he waited for her. Kept his silence and locked away whatever weak emotions that he held for her. Knowing that one day she would allow him to be what he wanted to be, her mate; someone that she would be able to trust and call her own.

And when that day finally had come, he left her alone and hurt to fulfil the mandate that the council wanted; his life. So Fury, not wanting to lose a brilliant asset went about making sure that Hawkeye was dead. Staging the explosion was easy but getting out of the country without the council still knowing that he was walking and breathing had proven to be difficult. Clint Barton had been retired permanently to the wilds of Alaska. He was just thankful that he already had a cabin hidden deep within the mountains. Completely and utterly off the grid. Just the way Nat and he had discussed on a number of occasions had they been able to get out of the game. Squeezing his eyes closed as the wall of pain hit his chest. It was a lonely existence but that was the price he paid to protect those that he loved most dearly. 

* * *

"Hey, has anyone seen Natasha?" Bruce stuck his head into the kitchen but only seem to find Steve standing at the sink as he gulped down the glass of water. Lifting his brow up as Steve held up one finger. "You want me to wait?"

"No, she's in Clint's room. Well, that is where the music is coming from." Steve shrugged a broad shoulder as he quickly rinsed the glass out and placed it on the drainer to dry. "She seems to be very quiet today but I'm glad that she came out of the room. I wonder if she'll be up for a sparring session later on." He muttered to himself as he turned and walked out of the room. Bruce's jaw had dropped to the ground as he watched the broad back of Steve Rogers disappearing around the door jam.

"Okay!" Bruce murmured as he lifted his brows up and down before giving himself a big shake before going back to his mission of finding Natasha Romanoff, who it had seemed that she did not want to be found, since he had already looked into Clint's room first. He mentally ticked off the places that he had already been . . ."You idiot." Turning on his heels and headed straight for the roof to a certain perch of a Hawk.

"Bruce." Natasha called lightly from the spot that she laid hidden in. Her head peering down at him before she flipped herself out of the nest and down onto the ground, making the Hulk growl at her intentions. His skin was starting to take on a slightly greenish tinged to it. "Don't worry. See no hurt." She held her arms out and slowly turned in a circle to show that she had no harm done to her. "Sorry Bruce."

"That is fine. It seems that you might have someone that will be highly protective of you." Bruce smiled at the irony of the situation that the rage monster wanted to protect a life. It was proof on how far the Hulk had come in his growth. Sure he was still simmering with rage and hatred but it was more focused now and a little less destructive. "Do you want to go somewhere more private?" His tone hinting at the news that he was delivering.

"Sure." Natasha murmured as she made her way down into Clint's room, sitting on the edge of his bed as she clasped her hands together and placed them between her knees. There were boxes laying around as his closet was opened to reveal the contents to be moved into those boxes.

"It's positive, Natasha. Congratulations." Bruce stood there and waited for the fireworks to begin. He was expecting an explosion to happen as he delivered the news that she was expecting but had been hoping that it was all a terrible dream.  
"Oh my!" Natasha whispered as her shoulders slumped forward. Well, she was expecting that but still, it was highly unexpected. She would try to figure that statement out later as she continued to stare at Bruce like he had grown another head. "I don't know what to say."

"Yeah, I figured that one out." Bruce smiled as he tilted his head with a flickering moment of concern at her deathly pale face as she continued to stare at him. "You're going to be alright?"

"Soon." Natasha stated as she swallowed the information and processed it. Not really liking what she came up with but she would play the hand that she had been dealt with. In effect it was a miracle that she had conceived at all and she was not going to turn her nose up at this. Had it been anyone else's child and the results would have been very much different. "Can we find out the gender of the baby?"  
"Yeah. Sure. We can." Bruce eyes widen as she stood up quickly before her eyes rolled back up into her head, making him run the short distance to catch her body with a Hulk bellow for good measure. Bruce groaned at this as it would make it difficult in keeping her secret if this was how the Hulk reacted.

"What's going on?" Steve was the first one through the door with his shield strapped to his wrist. Tony was panting behind him as he eyed the situation before them. Natasha groaned as she held her head for a moment.

"Easy, big boy!" Natasha croaked at the tightening of Bruce's arms around her ribs. "What happened?"

"You fainted and the Other Guy didn't like it." Bruce was not going to say that it was his way of asking for assistance. A smirk played upon her lips. The jig was up already.

"Why would she faint? You don't have germs, do you?" Tony practically back-pedalled out the door as Natasha smiled evilly at him.

"Yeah, it'll come to get you." She retorted as Bruce laid her gently on the bed. Her smile was full of sharp and pointed teeth. "Get back here, Tony." She called out. "I'm pregnant." She whispered as the room grew silent.

"I didn't know that you were with someone." Steve muttered as he glanced at her in his own bewildered way.

"Oh, that's rich!" Tony smirked as his head came through the door way. "And who plays the lucky papa?" He eyed the two men before him. "I know it wasn't me," He tilted his head for a moment before tacking on. "Because Pepper would seriously maim me."

"You really can be a moron!" Natasha snarled at him as she pulled her upper lip back. She was getting ready to flay him alive. It had been a while since she skinned someone. She was pretty sure she could still remember.

"Take your head out and think logically for a moment." Bruce puffed a breath out before taking his glasses off and rubbed at the corners of his eyes, praying for the strength not to strangle the man that stood before him.

"Well, it's not Thor." Tony stated as he rubbed his hands together. "We haven't seen him in a couple of months. Not since he took Loki back to Asgard." Which really only left one other possibility. "Clint?" A look of complete disbelief washed over his face. "Legolas? Really?"

"Yes, the child that I carry is his." Natasha hissed through her teeth at him as her accent bleed through with her words. This would have been a clear indicator to Clint to remove himself from the impending danger that was a very angered Nat. Tony not so much before he realised his mistake and ducked his head in time as a knife went flying in his direction.

"Hey, that's not nice." Tony whined from his position on the ground, carefully looking up at the upset woman on the bed.

"Next time, I won't miss." Natasha hissed as she closed her eyes. It had been an emotional draining day and she had no more tolerance to deal with Tony and his stupid questions.

"Looking we'll let you rest and than you can find out about the gender of the child. Sound like a plan?" Steve offered up in the silence as he watched the greenish tinged leave Bruce's skin, putting his hand down for Tony to grab onto as he was hauled back to his feet. "And Tony, next time, keep your mouth shut." He shook his head as they left the room.

Natasha closed her eyes as she shifted upon Clint's bed. Tears clung to her lashes as she rubbed her face into the pillow while laying a hand on her stomach, breathing in deeply as she done something that she had never done before. She spoke to Clint like he was standing there waiting. Her lips trembled as she spoke her words to him out loud:

"I'm sorry but I'm keeping it, Clint. It is all I have left and I'm being selfish for once and not following the rules."


	2. Friendship

**Chapter 2:  Friendship**

* * *

 

Natasha groaned as she rubbed at her eyes while she pushed the pillow that she had been hugging away from her. She knew she had been sleeping but her body still did not feel rested. She rolled over onto her back as she craned her neck to look at the alarm clock on the side of Clint's bed. Her head falling back down onto the pillow when she realised that it was only three in the morning. Great! She thought as she grabbed a pillow and shoved it over her face and inhaled the lingering scent that was Clint. Without too much forethought on her behalf as she sat straight up when her world instantly started to tilt off its axis and the room spun around making her groan at her own foolishness. Natasha figured she would never get use to that horrible feeling of being disorientated for the one thing that she most prided herself on was her self-control. Stark was not included in that assessment and if he kept pulling those snide remarks, well than, she would not be held accountable for her actions toward him.

"Come on. Let's have a shower and see if we cannot become more human again." She rubbed her hand over her lower stomach with some traces of disbelief. She figured that it would take some time to get use to the idea that she now held an innocent life within her body. That penetrating thought alone was very scary and left her with an uncertain future due to the doubts that were already starting to occupy her mind with. Swinging her body around as she threw her legs over the bed and sat haunch over as she waited for the room to stop spinning and her stomach to settle back down once again.

"May I be able to render you some assistance, Agent Romanoff?" Jarvis voice cut smoothly through the room as Natasha waved him off with her hand. "No, thank you and, Jarvis?" Natasha muttered as she slowly pushed herself into a standing position as her eyes slowly adjusted to the dimming lights as she made her way to the closet and grabbed some of Clint's clothing.

"Yes, ma'am?" Jarvis enquired. Natasha could well imagine him standing there with his eyebrow raised waiting for her to continue.

"Drop the agent part." She breathed out as she turned around to survey the room and all the boxes that sat waiting to be filled with his belongings. Natasha was unsure at the moment if she had the heart to remove him from her surroundings.

"Certainly, Ms. Romanoff." Jarvis replied back which made Natasha groaned because it was just like talking to Tony but only more robotic with manners. She shrugged her shoulders as she left it at that. She had managed to get him that far and she was not going to make more problems by arguing with a computer. No matter how much he makes life easier. See, she still had some form of common sense left.

She stepped into the bathroom as she gazed at the assortment of products that Clint used when he was not on mission. Natasha leaned against the hand basin as she peered carefully at her face to see if there were any changes that could be detected. The bags underneath her eyes were looking better after having a dreamless night. There was a hint of colour to her cheeks and also a decidable mysterious twinkle in her eyes that read: She had a secret to share but no one was going to know it until she was ready. Natasha sighed as she pushed her hand through her hair and held it back from her face as she stuck her tongue out.

Laughing softly at her ridiculous pose in the mirror, she decided that it was time to have that shower. Turning around before she reached into the cubical to set the correct temperature, her eyes caught sight of a piece of paper that was sticking out of his pants which happened to be lying in a crumpled heap on the floor. She lowered her body down onto the ground as she leaned forward to reach for his pants. Her very nimble fingers making light work of the paper as she unfolded it and scanned the wording on the paper. Her heart was sitting up within her throat as she swallowed hard against the forming lump that was about to take up residence there. Tears started sliding down her cheeks as she scanned the words on the paper.

A heart wrenching scream of denial left her voice raw and ragged as she slid sidewards against the wall and laid down upon the cold tile floor. The letter hung limply within her grasp as she stared uncomprehendingly at the wall in front of her. Natasha never heard the bathroom door opened or the sharp intake of breaths as they saw her prone body against the wall. Her red hair splayed out like it was blood. The page laying on the ground beside her as she muttered softly in her native tongue. Bruce was the first to reach her side with caution as he gentle placed a hand on her shoulder while saying her name. Her dying orbs flicking briefly to his eyes as she continued to quietly mutter to herself.

"Oh!" Bruce uttered as soon as he seen who's handwriting it was. Gingerly he picked up the letter and handed it to Steve. "Read it please."

"Sure. No problem." Steve grabbed the paper and cleared his throat before skimming the wording along the page. "Dear Nat. . ." Steve started.

"That's never good." Tony muttered before cringing at the telling glance he was receiving from Pepper. "Well, it's the truth. Ouch." He rubbed his arm as he quickly shot her a wounded look.

"Still. . ." Pepper stated as she folded her arms. Her eyes daring him to contradicted her.

"I'm going to pay for that remark in some way, aren't I?" Tony questioned her as she smirked at him. "Thought as much. Please continue." His eyes once more on Steve as he flicked his fingers in the continue motion. Pepper minutely shook her head at him before she gave Steve her full and undivided attention.

"May I?" Steve lifted his brow up as he waited patiently for Tony to settle down again. "Where was I? Dear Nat, it seems that only yesterday that you came to my attention as a target that I had to track and kill. . ."

"He doesn't pull his punches, does he?" Tony muttered over the glaring looks that he was receiving.

"That was one of the things I really liked about him. He was straight forward with me." Natasha whispered up from the floor as some of her guarded inner walls were down as she moved to sit up and prop her back against the wall behind her. A small smile touched her pale face briefly before she closed her eyes against the inner turmoil that was her heart.

"I can understand that." Steve replied in understanding from experience as being someone that had been used by the government for their own purposes as he picked up from where he had been rudely interrupted from before. "I had watched you for a period of time. I had watched the way that you would work the room. The elegant and graceful styling of how you carried your body was what had caught my attention. The hidden smile as you leaded your target into doing your bidding. . ."

"Whoa!" Tony screeched as he raced over to cover Pepper's ears. "I think someone was getting turned on." Tony stated bluntly which in turn was making Natasha blush. It would not have surprised her in the slightest if that was the case. Clint could be a very sensual man when he put his mind to it. Natasha just stopped short of fanning herself.

"I am not a child." Pepper hissed out as she removed Tony's hands from covering her ears. Tony speared with her a glance but wisely chose to keep his mouth closed.

"The way your eyes would light up when you sliced the target's throat. . ." Steve shuddered at the tone.

"I knew it." Tony danced on the spot. "Dark and twisted!"

"And you didn't gather that from our jobs?" Natasha retorted dryly at him.

"You, I can understand." Tony pointed a finger at her as he tilted his head to the side. "Him, not so much." Natasha chuckled darkly at this assessment. She would have been positive that Clint would have gotten a kick out of this conversation.

"The way that you stood there with pride and pleasure after snapping the target's neck before licking your bottom lip and sending me a come hither glance from underneath your lashes. Knowing that deep within I would come to claim you as my equal, my mate." Natasha grasped as she pushed herself into a standing position as Steve started to blush a little from what he was reading.

"Oh wow." Pepper was astounded just by the depth of emotions that was being poured out into the letter. Her eyes shifting towards Natasha as she stood there shaking. "That is some powerful emotions there."

"I know." Natasha whispered as she bowed her head. She had never known that he had actually thought of her in that sense. She was contented to know that he was happy with how their relationship had developed. She rested her hand on her lower abdomen as she quickly scanned the group. "Maybe we should take this outside the bathroom?" She quirk her brow as she pointedly glance towards the open door.

"Will you be alright?" Bruce asked as he continued to watch her pale face.

"Don't worry about me." Natasha stated as she waved him off. Knowing that they had been asleep before her scream had pulled them from bed was not exactly the best way to wake your team up first thing in the morning. She splashed water on her face as she moved towards the toilet to use it. Washing her hands and quickly combing her locks before she opened the door.

"We are going to stop reading this." Steve held the letter out to her.

"Thank you." Natasha stepped forward to take it and folded it back up again. She would keep this for her darkest moments in the night when she could not sleep and she needed to have Clint close to her. "I'm sorry."

"That's alright, Natasha." Pepper walked over and stood in front of the other woman. Her hands reaching up to gently rest on her shoulders. "We all have lost somebody or gone through the motions of having that one we love in danger." A shadow passed over her eyes briefly. "But know this. You are not alone in this." Pepper smiled as she gave Natasha's shoulders a gentle squeeze. "Now, I will say good night."

"Thank you, Pepper." Natasha nodded her head in understanding as she watched them file out with their good nights. She sat back down on the bed as she unfolded the letter that Clint had left her and read the last line out loud. "And know that I will always love you to my dying breath." Tears silently escaped as she quietly sobbed for the man that would never know that she had loved him just as deeply.

* * *

Clint panted as he sat up straight in his bed. The blankets pooling around his waist as the sweat slowly slid down his chest and back. He knew that his hair was sticking up in all different directions as he ran a hand down his face. The nightmare had faded already from his mind as he swung his legs over and his bare feet touched the cold floor. Grunting as the cool morning touched his arms, he pulled himself up to his full height and padded over to the stove and started to light a fire in it as he did a quick inventory of his supplies. It would seem that he needed to make a trip into the closest town, shaking his head as he ran a hand over the growth on his cheeks. Making him wonder what Nat would have thought of his beard.

He was glad that he had set up a dummy account that he could roll over for such a situation like now. As long as he kept what he needed to the bare minimum then he could survive with what he got off the land. He lifted the kettle onto the stove top before he padded over to his chair and pulled on his clothing that he had placed there last night, rubbing his hands together as he tried to warm himself up quickly. He could well imagine the dark mutterings of Nat had she been here. She may have been born and raised in the good old U.S.S.R but she hated the Russian cold with a vengeance and would do almost anything to get out doing those assignments. He had a sneaking suspicion that she had only grumbled as much as she did so she could share his body heat quicker; which was more than fine with him.

He turned his attention back to the kettle that was whistling. He set about making himself a morning coffee and breakfast as he pulled a frying pan out from underneath the counter. He was still in the process of setting up his cabin and everything was still in disarray. He stirred the sugar into his black coffee, glad that he had that luxury. He could remember many a mission when it was just straight coffee with no sugar to sweeten it. Sometimes, you just had to pack light to survive to fight another day and he did not feel for the enemy when they got in his way on those missions. He was a mean one when he had no coffee. He could make Nat look like a tamed pussy cat. He laughed as he took a quick sip of his hot beverage and sighed with contentment as he finished cooking his eggs when the sound of his ringtone; cursing himself because he forgot to turn it off as he made his way over to answer it.

"James Evens." He barked into the phone as he waited for the other person.

"Nice day to be in Siberia." The gruff voice replied back.

"Only if you like the cold in Moscow." Clint answered automatically.

"Line is secure. How are you holding up?" Fury asked.

"As well as could be expected, sir." Clint really did not want to get into it. He could deal with a lot of things but this was going to prove to be the hardest.

"I thought to check in with you." Fury mumbled as he stared at the file on his computer. "We have no new developments."

"Figured as much. It'll take time." Clint sighed as he brought his cup to his lips and took a sip, allowing the hot liquid to burn his throat. "How's Nat holding up?"

"I have given her time off as she has just lost her partner." Fury murmured meaningful into the phone.

"Bet that went down like a lead pipe." Clint chuckled as he pictured her throwing a fit at being sidelined for a moment.

"You have no idea." Fury breathed before he hung up making Clint stare at his phone.

Shaking his head, he put his phone away and made his way back to the kitchen and eaten his meal before tidying up the breakfast dishes. He glanced around the empty room before he reached for his bow and quiver that was sitting by the door. He needed to get out of the empty nest and back into the wilds. Zipping up his jacket as he slung his equipment onto his back, he gaze sweeping the area once more before he headed outside into the forest. Carefully closing and locking his door before he did so, taking in a lung full of fresh mountain and step off his front porch. Turning in a easterly direction, he went in search for tomorrow's dinner.

* * *

Natasha looked with suspicious eyes between Bruce and Tony as they stood there and blinked at her. Honest to god, blinking as if she were some alien and she had just stumbled upon them. Shaking her head as she continued to watch them as they started to quietly chat among themselves and leave her out. She had no idea what they were babbling on about but it was starting to annoy her. It seemed that her body was not her own anymore.

"So I do have great news, Natasha." Bruce started off before he shot a look at Tony. "You're not carrying twins."

"At this stage." Tony muttered to himself as Natasha glared at him before turning her gaze back onto Bruce again.

"But I do want to conduct an ultrasound to make sure that the embryo has attached to the uterus with no problems." Bruce moved over to where the machine stood.

"Don't I need to drink a load of water?" Natasha stated as she lifted an eyebrow up.

"No need for that." Tony scoffed as he went to stand besides Bruce. "I would give you the details but I don't want to bore you." He drawled as he clicked his fingers in his show of being bored. "We're going to do this?" He spun around on his heels as he clapped his hands together.

"Yeah, I suppose but why you?" Natasha stared at Tony hard as she tried to figure out what he wanted from her.

"It's really not that difficult." Tony started to lecture her. "I have not up to this point been able to test this machine under its proper working environment. You're actually the first pregnant woman that I know." Tony shrugged his shoulders which made Natasha laugh at the sheepish twinkle in his eyes.

"Okay, let's get this done." Natasha screwed her nose up before she walked over to the bed and lifted herself onto it. She laid back against the pillow as she waited to see what Bruce and Tony were going to do.

"I'm just going to flip your shirt up and tuck it under here." Bruce stated with his words as he followed through with the actions. His eyes flicked over towards Tony as he moved behind them to operate the controls. A slight buzzing sound entered the room to indicate that the machine had started and was currently in use. Natasha had no idea on how she really felt about it all as she continued to observe the situation.

"It's not going to. . ." She started only to close her mouth at Tony's sharp look.

"Wouldn't dream of having you in here if that was the case." Tony held his hand over his arc reactor as he shot her a wounded look.

"We got anything yet?" Bruce asked as he spun around and shot a telling look at him.

"Why is everyone glaring at me today?" Tony huffed as he pushed a couple of more buttons as imagine came up onto the screen in front of them. "You try to be nice and . . . Ah, here we are!"

"Wow." Natasha was in awed as to what she was seeing. She could see the baby starting to take form as she blinked back the tears, wishing that Clint had been here to witness this beautiful event. "Good, good." Bruce walked up to the screen and studied it for a moment.

"I think with some careful monitoring you might just make it to full term." His fingers brushed over some of the scarred tissue that was more prominent on the screen.

"So how far along do you think I am?" Natasha asked as she continued to stare transfixed on the tiny bud that was nestling in her womb.

"I would roughly put you at maybe six weeks. It's a bit difficult to tell due to your mods." Tony stated as he ran some measures through the machine.

"And not only that, all babies grow at different rates." Bruce gritted through his teeth.

"So this baby is to blame for my emotional outbursts?" Natasha whispered as her gaze flicked over to Bruce.

"Yes while your body is accommodating for its newest resident. How is your dizziness doing?" Bruce asked as he got the pressure cuff out and wrapped it around her arm.

"It seems to be good if I get up slowly." Natasha smiled a little at this new weakness that she had developed.

"I think that if we start you on those supplements and your new dietary intake. You should be fine. How do fortnightly check-ups sound?" Bruce jotted down her blood pressure before removing the cuff from her. "Blood pressure is a little down but that is to be expected. Light exercises only, no full body contact." He wagged a finger in her direction.

"Anything else?" Natasha snapped.

"Natasha, I'm not restricting you." Bruce heaved a long-suffering sigh. He could already tell that it was not going to be easy living with a heavily pregnant Natasha if her reactions were anything to go by now. It made him wonder how Clint could do this when she was injured but he had a feeling that they were stubborn as each other.

"It feels like you are." She retorted heavily back as she unfolded her shirt down and sat up before she swung her legs down.

"I'm not the enemy." Bruce rolled his eyes as Tony sniggered in the background.

"Are we done here?" Natasha huffed as she folded her arms just when her stomach made its presence known by rumbling. She had not realised that she was that hunger and that she had nothing to eat since lunchtime.

"We're done." Bruce chuckled at her timing before he walked over to Tony and conferred with him on what they had seen. Their dinners were the last things on their minds as they worked through the night to develop the other blood work of Natasha as they realised that she was being pushed to the limits of her comfort zone with all the testing that they had been conducting over the last few days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know if the flow is not quite right as it was a formatting nightmare in getting this done.


	3. Calming Presence

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone that has read this story so far and a special thank you to the Guest. As usual I own nothing. So enjoy this new chapter.

Chapter 3:  Calming Presence

* * *

Natasha stood in front of the mirror with her shirt flipped up as she closely scrutinised her stomach. Looking for the little tells of that she was carrying another human being within her. She had finally gotten to the point of acceptance but she still felt that she would be no good as a mother. But she thought that all new mothers would have felt this way, at some point or another. That seemed to be the only logical thought that she happily accepted as she pulled her shirt down and soothed it over her hips.

At eight weeks, there was nothing to discern the fact, other than the darken circles under her eyes from the lack of rest that she was currently receiving or that she spent most of her early mornings inspecting the toilet bowl. No one was any the wiser to her current condition but she knew that she would have to inform Director Fury at some point and before there was no denying the evidence. Natasha had never been one to worry about the rumours that circulated the hallways but even she knew that this would definitely get the tongues wagging. Everyone knew about the betting pool and she was slightly interested to see as to who they put the father as.

With a tiny smile on her face, she spun on her heels and made her way out of her bedroom and walked down to the kitchen. Stopping short as Tony stood at the sink with his arms folded over his chest, staring out of the floor to ceiling windows. A pensive expression was upon his face as he turned quickly and glance at Natasha standing there. His expression instantly disappeared at her furrowed brows.

"Come to join the land of the living, Natasha?" Tony smirked as he reached over and flicked the switch to start up the coffee machine.

"Bit early for you, Tony?" Natasha muttered as she stepped across the threshold and over to the refrigerator; opening the door as she looked at all the food that sat there. Her mind undecided on what exactly she wanted.

"Who said I went to sleep?" His smirk did not quite reach his eyes as he glanced once more out of the windows.

"So that explains the witty words." Natasha threw over her shoulder at him as she pulled the eggs and cream from their respective places. Straightening up as she moved to stand next to him, setting her ingredients down onto the counter before she moved off to find the rest of the equipment that she would need to make her meal.

"Hmm." Tony murmured noncommittally which was a clear indication that his attention was clearly not in the room let alone with the conversation that they were having at present.

"What's wrong?" Natasha folded her arms as she leaned a hip against the counter. Her stance mimicked Clint before she brushed a piece of hair behind her ear.

"What's to say there is something wrong?" Tony asked distractedly before he visibly shook himself off and stared directly at her, his vision seeming to be tracking her every movement. Natasha was feeling kind of crept out about it.

"Staring off into the distance with no verbal comebacks." Natasha shot him a look that read: Do I really need to continue?

"Point duly noted." He blinked at her before sighing and running a hand through his hair as his face contorting into a grimace at the fact that she had caught him out doing just exactly that. "Just got something on my mind."

"I worked that much out." Natasha dryly muttered to him as she inclined her head for him to continue on with his thought process. Which in itself is a very dangerous endeavour to embarked upon but she just could not stop herself.

"Would you marry me?" Tony blurted out as Natasha did a double take and nearly chocked on her laughter as he slowly blinked at her. She was starting to think that the man was bipolar.

"Um. . .Wow, Stark. I don't know what to say!" Natasha bit her lip. She was struggling to maintain a serious face as he continued to watch her. She had no idea where that question came from and she was sure that she had not given him any reason to think that way.

"Not like that." Tony snorted as he waved his hand in the region of her stomach. "I know that you are already spoken for." He folded his arms as his long fingers tapped out a beat that only he was listening too. "Okay, let's try this again. _Would_ you marry me?"

"Me. . .Personally. . .Not in a million years." Natasha tilted her head as she watched his shoulders slump slightly. She raised an eyebrow as an idea formed in her head. "But I do know of someone that wouldn't miss it for the entire world."

"And how did you come by that assessment?" Tony glared at her as he placed his hands upon his hips.

"Simple observation!" Natasha smiled sweetly at him with a hint of steel within her eyes as she turned around and started to prepare her meal. "It's really not that difficult to figure."

"I take it's about as easy as you and Barton?" He retorted as he calmly continued to gaze at her as her back stiffen at the mention of his name. Her eyes narrowing down to slits as she glared at him. "Okay, touchy subject." He held his palms up and out as Natasha blew a ragged breath out.

Steve came around the corner as he stopped and absorbed the stand-off that was happening in the kitchen between Tony and Natasha; which he could not really say that he was surprised by that at all. Tony just had the knack for annoying his teammates to the point of death, his of course, but that was just semantics. The air itself was decidedly chillier than it was an hour ago when he was in here last. He shook his head before making his way over to the cupboard and pulled a glass down setting it down upon the counter. He turned upon his heel as he headed towards the fridge and snagging the orange juice out of the door, he made his way back to his glass and started to pour the juice out when he froze as he heard a hiss behind him.

"What have I done now?" Steve asked wearily as he slowly turned around to face Natasha. Almost gulping with dread at the narrow eyed expression she was giving him and he just knew how insane Clint was now. This was far worst than any mine field that he had ever been in. He inwardly groaned before pulling himself up to his full height. His eyes twitched at the baring of her teeth.

"That's mine!" She almost snarled at him as she pointed to the carton in his hand. A sense of battle was tingling along her spine as she continued to glare at them. Steve glanced down at the offending drink sitting harmlessly within his grasp before shifting his eyes back onto her. He wonder how the #!*% did he get into this mess and most importantly on how he was going to extract himself with limbs intact, hopefully, from the insane situation that was currently Natasha. A hidden smile tugged at his lips as the smell of burning food caught his attention.

"Your eggs are burning." Steve pointed out as Natasha snapped her eyes away to deal with her meal before she briefly glanced once more at him. He continued to watch her as the flames licked the sides of her eyes. He was not out of her line of fire. So he did the next best thing and asked for permission. "May I have a glass, please?" He hedged as he really had no idea on how she would react to that. He could tell when the light of battle left her eyes and she nodded her head. He almost wiped his brow as one major obstacle had been overcome and it was only nine thirty in the morning.

"Could you pour me a glass as well, thanks?" Natasha muttered as another feeling of uneasiness flooded her nervous system. She was starting to dislike the new emotions that were constantly being emitted. She arranged her eggs onto a plate as she placed the pan into the sink for it to be cleaned later. She grabbed her plate and glass of juice with a muttered thank you and quickly vacated out of the room. She could not believe that she just went toe-to-toe with Steve over a glass of orange juice.

"That was intense." Steve murmured as he watched her leave the room. "I thought she was about to tear me to pieces."

"And it'll only get worst." Tony rubbed at his chin in deep thought. "I'm sure we can blame it on the hormones."

"Think we should run for cover?" Steve was being serious as he swallowed the rest of his juice in one gulp. Walking over to the sink and rinsed his glass out before he washed the pan up and place it in the drainer as well.

"And miss the pendulum of moods that is currently Natasha?" Tony smirked at the look of utter horror that crossed Steve's face. "Not on your life."

"You must have a death wish." Steve muttered under his breath as he wiped his hands on the dish towel before he folded it and put it away.

"Come on, it'll be fun!" Tony sniggered.

"Yeah, it'll be real swell." Steve rolled his eyes as he folded his arms across his chest. Not believing for one moment that it would be as fun as Tony made it out to be. He carefully gauged his clearly unstable teammate before pushing himself off the counter and walked towards the door before throwing over his shoulder. "I think you need some rest, Tony, because your brain is not engaged."

"Nothing wrong with my thought process." Tony's snarky voice echoed after Steve. "I'm living in a nuthouse." He shook his head as he turned back once more towards the window.

* * *

 

Clint blew on his hot cup of coffee as his gaze flicked out over the horizon. The world itself was silent as the breeze had increased with speed over time. The temperature was dropping rapidly and he could see that the sky was darkening from the heavy clouds that hung in the distance. He had been expecting the change in the weather as he continued to gaze out of the window. Stuck deep in his thoughts as he went over his supplies that he currently had and what he would need after a period of time that the snow itself would last. He was just thankful that he had chopped wood a couple of days ago in preparation for the coming storm.

He caught a glimpse of the wolf that had been watching him earlier in the week. The feeling of being hunted was not there but they would continue to observe what the other would be doing. It reminded him very much of Natasha when she first came to join S.H.I.E.L.D; the watchful silence as she had sat there trying to work out how the system ran and how she fitted into it. He loved the way her brain would tick over with her thoughts. He leaned his head back and huffed out a breath as he closed his eyes tightly against the onslaught of pain. Making him wonder that maybe he should have slipped over the border and seen her from a distance but he knew that Fury would have his head served on a silver platter; if he ever step a foot back into New York City.

He was off the grid here. No one would be able to find him in the backwoods of nowhere with no electricity and phone. Well, except for the one currently in his possession and he had not charged the battery for the fear that Natasha would get her hands on the number, which in turn, would get her on the next available flight out of New York and hunt him down. What she would do to him? Was best left alone if she ever caught wind of what he was doing. But still, it got #!*% lonely here. He lift his cup to his lips and tilted it as he took a sip of the hot beverage before he placed the cup down onto the coffee table before pushing himself into a standing position.

Walking over to where the wood pile was stack, he realised that he would need more wood if he was going to make it through the next few days. Running his hand down his face as he calculated on exactly how much he would need, he stalked over to the door before pulling on his boots and coat as his hand made their way into the pocket for his fingerless gloves; slipping them on before he turned the door knob and made his way silently over to the woodshed. He could feel that he was being watched as his sharp gaze searched the area before spotting a familiar shadow of the wolf that he had seen earlier through the window pane. A small smile tugged at his mouth as he shook his head before he went to the woodpile and gathered the amount that he would need before loading what he could carry into his arms.

It took him four trips to finally get the work done. His muscles were tingling with all the carrying that he had been doing. Sure, he was already in prime shape, had to be with his line of work and choice of weaponry. His gaze coming to rest briefly on his seldom used bow but it still felt nice to do some physical labour. Rubbing his hands together as he stomped his feet. He was just thankful that the trek was not longer between the two buildings because it would be difficult to navigate between them if he ever needed anymore wood.

He carefully toed off his boots before he crossed the room and double checked his water supply; it was not like that he did not have more coming anyway. He knew that his food supply was fine and that he had candles in the drawer, if and when, he needed them. He scanned around his home before he marched over to the cupboard and opened it. His hand reached in and snagged the first heavy blanket that he could grab before throwing it across his bed. Making his way over to the fireplace, he kneel down and started the fire as he turned his head at the flakes of snow that were drifting down his window. The wind was starting to howl as the fire flickered to life. He dusted his hands as he stood up and walked over to his seriously cold cup of coffee. Hanging his head as he groaned before picking up the cup and making himself a fresh one before sitting down in front of the fire to stare into the dancing flames, lost within his memories with a tiny smile upon his harden face.

* * *

 

"Where are you going?" Tony called out as he spied Natasha walking past the room that he was currently lounging in. The remote was dangling loosely within his grasp as the volume was turned down low. His attention not even focused on the infomercial that was blinking brightly within the darken room. His eyes looking more blood shot than they did this morning.

"Have you been to sleep yet, Stark?" Natasha glanced over to him when she finally stopped and back tracked to where she heard his voice come from.

"Sleep is over rated." He huffed as he waved his hand about in the air.

"I'm pretty sure that Pepper wouldn't agree with you." Natasha huff a breath out as she continued to watch the sleep deprived billionaire. She was torn between laughter and despair with him.

"What would she know?" Tony muttered before dragging his hand down his face. Natasha lifted her eyebrow in disbelief. "She's standing right behind me, isn't she?"

"You could say that!" Natasha snickered at the way that his eyes widen as his mouth worked to form an apology before turning his head around, only to find that a blank wall was behind him. His face scowling as he turned heated eyes onto her.

"That was just plain evil." Tony retorted as he moved to stand up from his seat.

"If you had your full. . ." Natasha started as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Director Fury called, Ms. Romanoff." Jarvis smoothly interrupted the beginnings of their heated debate. "He wishes to meet with you."

"Thank you, Jarvis." Natasha returned politely as she continued to gaze at Tony. His features were starting to look haggard under the soft glow of the television. "You really need to sleep, Tony."

"No, I'm fine." Tony brushed off her concern.

"Look we can do this the easy way or the hard way; your decision?" Natasha firmly stated as worry settled into the pit of her stomach. She knew what it was like not to get the needed rest but she had also been trained to function mentally and physically without it. It had even saved her life a few times and now, was not one of them.

"Are you threatening me?" Tony grasped at her, the hurt clearly ringing through his voice at her seeming betrayal that Natasha just wanted to knock him out and be done with it.

"No, Stark, I wouldn't do something so mundane." She pinched the bridge of her nose before turning her eyes towards the ceiling and drew in a deep breath. She did not think that Clint in all of his stubbornness could be this difficult and they had some pretty speculator stand-offs in their history.

"That is not very reassuring." Tony sprouted as he widened his eyes to impossible sizes.

"I can get Bruce up here to deal with you." Natasha could feel her patience slipping with each passing moment. "You need to sleep!" She finally snapped at him.

"I know that but I just can't. No matter how much I try." Tony whispered into the room as his shoulders slumping forward in defeat. "The black void keeps calling to me." He speared her with his eyes. "I have done a lot of things that I am not particular proud of. . ."

"I know." Natasha offered the olive leaf. "We all have our demons that we have to deal with."

"Yeah, that much I do know." Tony ran his hand down his face, feeling for the first time as bone tired as he can be. As if, the weight of the world rested only upon his shoulders. "How do you do it?"

"Sleep when I can and workout when I can not." Natasha shrugged her shoulders. She did not have all the answers but she would help with what she did know. "Have you told Pepper about this?"

"I don't sleep well as it is." Tony chuckled humourlessly. "And I don't really want to burden her anymore than I already have." Natasha nodded her head in understanding. She had felt the same way when it came to Clint but as she came to learn that it was part of being in a partnership with him.

"You'll be very surprised." Natasha advised as she took a step into the room and gently pushed Tony back down into his chair before kneeling at his head to massage his temples. It was something that she would do for Clint when he found it near impossible to sleep. Her voice had taken on a husky tone as she hummed an unnamed song. Her sharp eyes watching as Tony fought to close his eyes. It was like soothing a child, albeit a full grown one, to sleep. She heard the soft footfalls before the sharp intake of breath of Pepper as she entered the room.

"You haven't killed him, have you?" Pepper's voice held a playful tone to it. Natasha tilted her head as she blinked steadily at the other woman.

"Thought about it." Natasha smirked as she scooted away and allowed Pepper to take her seat.

"How did you get him to sleep?" Pepper was awed by what Natasha had done.

"Same thing that I do for Clint," She held her finger to her lips as she swore Pepper to that secret. "Especially when he hasn't slept for days and his mind is still wired. Funny to watch but it gets tiring after awhile."

"I can't even imagine that." Pepper chewed her lip for a moment. "He always seemed so serious."

"That was just him thinking." Natasha smiled fondly as she reached over and clasped the other woman on the shoulder before giving her a gentle squeeze before she stood up and walked from the room. Her original mission forgotten about as she headed towards the gym; Bruce did say that she was allowed to do light exercises after all. A mischievous smile pulled at her lips as she waited for the elevator. She was going to get into so much trouble as she chuckled darkly before entering the elevator and pushed the floor that she wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Until next time, have a good one! :D

**Author's Note:**

> A bit of self promotion but this story has been entered into a competition over on Inkitt. You'll find it under stories (slash) 29271


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